“When Love Isn’t Worth It…”

Supposing that you like to take risks in life, I think you can relate to the above title of this note: “When Love Isn’t Worth It.” If you were honest with yourself you probably have thought that at one time or another in a relationship or with someone you care about deeply.
This, unfortunately, has passed my mind in every relationship I have been in so far. Yes, that means I am single and yes, that means I have not had any luck in finding the right one. But back to the topic… maybe many of you can’t relate to this note and if that is you it is perfectly ok, because most likely you will one day.

But if you can relate, then let me tell you some things I have gleaned over the past years about relationships. Now this isn’t authoritative teaching or a “How-to” process, this is just some things I have learned and that I want to share. As always with any of my notes… you can take it or leave it!

So there are three major signs to look for in determining when love isn’t worth it:

1. When there is no honesty or genuineness in the relationship.

I know, especially for guys, that I am driven by looks first, notice how I said first and not just looks period. Looks for me is important. It doesn’t mean I am shallow it means that I am attracted to only certain females and that is normal for anyone. Now here is where the rubber meets the road: looks fade guys! She won’t always be smokin’ hot on the outside per se, unless you are really blessed. But if you genuinely love her she should always be beautiful to you. But what makes me more turned off by a girl than anything else including physical appearance is a girl that is a liar and not genuine. If she can’t be straight up with you, or is two-faced then a relationship will never work.

2. When there is no genuine reciprocation.

In layman’s terms, when you put in 100% effort and time and emotion and commitment into a relationship (and you should) and your partner is not putting in their 100% consistently, then love isn’t worth it. If your partner really loved you, then he/she would make sacrifices to be with you and to spend time with you. If he/she consistently isn’t doing their fair share in the relationship, then it’s time to move on.

3. When their is a disagreement on major issues: such as religion, family values, etc.

Now I know that many people steer away from this one when they are looking for a partner to date or for marriage (really isn’t the purpose of dating to find the right one for marriage?) but it is vital, I believe, in a long lasting relationship. Now I have dated girls that have had similar beliefs then myself and I have dated girls that, well… have not. It appears to me that important issues like religion, values and ethics, possibly politics, and other issues are key in seeing compatibility and genuine companionship. Now of course there will be disagreements with your partner, no two people are exactly the same… then you would kind of be marrying yourself, which sounds illegal and not to mention down-right creepy. These issues are the backbone for how you view the world, how you will raise a family, how you will handle tough situations, and how long your relationship will last.